Seperation...

Well, I was just off for half an hour or so.
I needed some time for myself with a piece of paper and a pen.
I needed to write some feelings.
And now I will write some feelings down here...
I feel like there's gonna be a seperation coming soon. With whom, I dont' know.
If it's gonna be pulle, Matilde or somebody else...I really don't know.
All I know is, that I'm easy to tears these days.
Especially when I think of one person in particular.
It hurts and my throat lumps...my eyes tear up. I've been a bitch to her and I feel like I can't get through to her anymore.
I read her blog and I wish ''Why isn't it me?'', ''why aren't I there??''. My thoughts get desperate.
Sigh. I think I'll regret posting this blog, but wtf.
I just don't feel the same kind of attacthment to anything, anymore.
People are slipping out through my fingers, like sand. Like they're running, and I'm running after, but I can never quite reach them. They're just out of reach.
My thoughts get so depressive in the evening...this jealousy and hatred towards myself kills me.

// Bim.