I want to give this world

a piece of my mind.

This piece of my mind, is one that everyone says 'omg get over yourself!' about and I am so sick

and tired of it. Sick and tired of being told that I should be happy about this. Anybody who wonders

what this piece is about? It's about having no hips, no chest, no thighs, bones sticking out. It's about

being skinny. Being too skinny. In my own opinion that is. I don't wish I was one of these girls. These

skinny, scary-looking creatures, who are supposed to pose of as human. These girls with wrists which

you can fold two fingers around. These girls, who have bones, where there are supposed to be curves,

skin and fat. Girls like me. I've grown to accept my body as it is, but that doesn't mean I don't wish 

for it to be different. I want curves. I want to look like a woman. I am sick and tired of you girls

with beautiful curves in the right places, complaining about being fat. You are seriously not fat. You are

fucking attention whores, who just wants people to say 'omg shut up, you are definitely not fat!'. And 

I am simply sick and tired of it. People being attention whores. Okay, every person is an attention

whore. I am too. But there is a difference. At least I think so. I crave attention, because I think it's

funny when people hate me...and positive attention? Well...don't we all love positive attention? ;) But 

when a girl or a boy sit down and write on Facebook: 'I want to disappear and see how the people 

around me would react!' or post a picture of themselves crying...it makes me sick. I can't help

thinking 'face your problems...don't Facebook them'. I admit. I have been like that once. But I learned

the hard way that nobody really cared in the end. And the people who did care? Well they didn't

comment on it for real. Only the fake ones, who only wanted some dirt to spread around the block. 

I stopped doing it again. My business is not everybody else's business. It's my business. And of course

the people related to my business. I want to gain weight. And I am doing something to reach my goal.

Approximately 10kg is what my goal is. But it is really hard for me to reach this goal. I have almost been 

trying for a year now. But then I get sick or something and then I lose the weight I gained before I got sick.

It sucks. Well, I'm just tired of people telling me: 'oh don't complain! You could look like me!'...thank

you very much bitch, maybe that is exactly what I want to look like? Sigh. I accept my body and I know

a lot of other people think I have the perfect weight. That gives me confidence. Confidence is not something

I lack. I know I am beautiful and actually am perfect the way I am. I should be happy about my looks.

Many girls would die to look like me. But I would die to look like them, which always seem to puzzle

them. Well, that's not so strange, now is it? Hmm, I guess that's my piece of mind. This turned into

a quite messy blog post....screw it, it has to match me..messy..you know. ;)

Be happy with who you are!! 

Scary.

Disgusting.

Beautiful.

Terrifying. 

Wonderful!

Stunning.

Mind-opener.

No matter what I say, I always believe you should be happy with who you are
and learn to live with your flaws. We can never be perfect. We can try. But it
will never be enough. Because what is perfect? It is just a word we invented so people
would have something to live for. People live for the goal of being perfect. They die
for it. But perfect is not what you see in the magazines. Perfect is what you want 
perfect to be. Nothing less and nothing more. If you have a goal to be perfect at 
everything, you will have to look inside yourself first and say 'what does perfect
mean to me?'. Now go out and chew on that...I know what perfect is to me.
But what is perfect to you?