Wauw, actually I'm glad.

So I wrote about a bitch just a while back. She still is a bitch. And I still won't mention any names. But I found out today, something I hadn't known before. While we were friends, the probability that she was in love with me were 99,999% certain. I had never seen that blog post, which made me certain of this fact before. The thought of me, being insecure of my feelings of her...now I'm sure I never felt anything. No attraction, no feelings, just plain friendship. But that's not really what this post was supposed to be about. I ended up on her Twitter and read some posts...I read posts between her and her best friend. It sounded exactly like the way we used to write. And I felt like...I was happy. I was happy that I didn't need that anymore. All those declarations of love all the time. Everyday...having to debate about 'you're the most pretty..no you are...no you'. I love the friendships I have right now. I'm glad I don't have to tell someone I love her every twenty minutes, because otherwise she won't believe it. I'm glad I don't have this jealousy trip anymore that I had with her. We had our moments, of course. We had a great friendship...some days. But now? I don't need to be told every five seconds, I'm loved. I believe in peoples words, even if they only tell me at special moments. The words 'I love you' can also be used too many times. They'll become abused and just words. Not a feeling. Just words. Feeling like you can really be calm and not worry about losing the other person just by saying one wrong thing. That's how I felt with that bitch back then. The thought of her feelings for me back then...it kinda pleases me. I know, I know! What a terrible thing to say! But I guess I am kinda terrible. If I'm angry at somebody, I'm angry. There's just no way around it. And I can be a real bitch, when I'm angry at a person. Not caring if I hurt the other persons feelings. Well well, I'm still the girl with sugar sweet words and thoughts in my head, but not in the same way as back then, at all. Feeling obligated to love somebody...ew, that's nothing for me.