So much has changed.

A little more than a year ago I went to high school, though I dropped out again. We got an assignment to choose a picture to analyse. I chose this one. No one in my group wanted to analyse it. At that point I couldn't see why they didn't want to analyse it. Today is a different story. I totally see why they didn't like it and couldn't understand why I wanted to choose exactly this picture. Their minds weren't at the same place as mine. They were...happy. And so was I. To some extent. But I wasn't happy happy. My psyche wan't in tact. I had some issues with myself, my body, my personality, my life in general. This picture symbolized that. I'm the girl in the middle and the hands are the confusing and heart breaking feelings and thoughts in my head. I even had thoughts of killing myself. It somehow turned around when I realized, I was a lesbian. A couple of pieces fell into place. But the turning point was last February, when I started at my current school. I started to find myself, my clothes, who I wanted to be. My life was forming. Why? Because I found a place, where I belonged and felt secure. I found my second 'home'. Everybody accepted me as I was and they've been doing so ever since. Every new person that came to the team, were accepting and liked me for who I was. Since then everything started to go oh-so-fast! And now...now I have the most amazing friends and a wonderful girlfriend. Everything is so changed! My psyche is starting to fall into place (every teenage girl has psychic problems, that's my theory) and I'm growing. Mentally. I've got a lot of self-esteem. Loads of it, actually. Enough to spare. When people don't think they're as pretty as they are, I always try to change their view on themselves. Like I changed my own view on myself. Everything is so different from the little insecure, confused teenager I was back then...to the mature woman I'm slowly turning into. 

Before.

After.